Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Act II: You Left

It was like a scene from a movie.


He said goodbye to our friends. One at a time, leaving me for last. When he looked at me, all I could see were two deep emotions, sadness and love. I promptly told him not to look at me like that, turned my head so I wouldn't cry and stood up to hug him goodbye. 

He wrapped me in his arms and I wrapped him in mine. We held each other like we didn't want to let go. No words, because none were needed. We both snuggled into each other trying to soak up every second. I felt him take a few deep breaths then we parted. He looked at me again and I sat down. He said goodbye to everyone and headed out the door. 

Holding the door open for him is our friend and my best friend in the whole entire world. The kind of separated at birth, are you SURE we aren't related?? kind of best friend. As he disappeared from the doorway, descending the stairs to his car she looked right at me and inserted babysitter voice. She said "If you don't go down there, you are going to regret it for a long time and I don't want to hear about it all night." Now, she and I have never been nasty to each other, so I knew she meant business. I retorted with "I don't have my boots on, I'll never make it." She was quick to say "Slip my shoes on and go! You are going to miss him." 

So I did. I slid my feet into the slightly too big slip on shoes. I felt like a complete moron. I was wearing skinny jeans with socks and slip on shoes. I am sure I was a sight to be seen. But I was fairly confident that he wouldn't be looking at my feet. My turn to quickly descend the stairs, feeling much like Cinderella about to lose a slipper and this time with a plot twist of chasing her prince. 

I thought for a moment, I wasn't going to make it. When I got to the bottom of the stairs, he was already getting into his car. I turned the corner as he revved the engine, so naturally, I ran. I slowed down as I reached the driver's side. I tapped on the window and smiled. He started to roll down the window when I gave him the the come-hither gesture and he promptly opened the door. 

Out of breath and nervously I said, "I was pushed out the door, told that if I didn't come down here that I would regret it for a...." 

There was no finishing that sentence. He looked deep into my eyes, smiled, placed his hand on my cheek, pulled me in and kissed me. Time instantly stops, I cant think about anything other than the feeling that washes over me. Its like serious narcotics, the best I've ever had. We hugged, we kissed, it was magic.

I looked at him and said "This will be the hardest six months of my life." All he said was "Focus." Then he kissed me again. As we parted ways, I pulled my scarf to my face as the tears bubbled to the surface. Walking behind his car, I turned and looked back. He was looking at me through the back windshield. We both waved. The lump in my throat grew and this time I couldn't swallow it.

I ran back across the parking lot and up the stairs. As I reached the door, all I wanted to do was crumple against the wall and sob my eyes out. But there was nothing to hid behind. I watched him pull out of the parking lot as I opened the front door. My vision blurred, entire body shaking with emotion. All I could think was where is my best friend?

When I found her, she was in the bathroom with the door open. Neither of us cared. I sat on her bed. She asked if I was going to cry, telling me that its okay. All I could do was nod my head. The tears flowed, I was heaving the uncontrollable and ugly cry that's so beautiful at the same time because it came at the right moment. She sat next to me, held me and we had a Grey's anatomy Christina/Meredith moment, because she's my person.

I was having so many emotions all at once and that was okay. I was so happy that we had the weekend we had together. I was so sad that he was leaving. And I was so scared about what the future held. Scared because it is unknown. Scared because I already didn't want to lose this opportunity with him. Scared because I could feel my life starting again and it felt good.

The curtain closes on a scene that we've acted countless times. My person and I are sitting on her bed with tissues and listening to Taylor Swift. We are Taylor Swift-ing our feelings out, because she has a song for every emotion.

It was like a scene from a movie. 


No comments:

Post a Comment